question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
