I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Me too!
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
