____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
