R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
