Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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