I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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