This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
He kissed a someone with a penis
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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