maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
