I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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