her vagine was all disorganized.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize