I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I skipped work to stalk him.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Randomize