Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
