Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Randomize
