somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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