brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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