no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
