You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize