is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
