I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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