Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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