if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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