wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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