I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
