we're blogging at a bar
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
