you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize