it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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