"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Bring me that man meat
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
