Where did you get a picture of my penis
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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