don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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