On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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