hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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