oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
