xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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