ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
