Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(318): View more from Louisiana

That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch

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(318): That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch http://tfl.nu/faw2

Replies (4) Good night (1357) Bad night (605)
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(630): View more from Illinois

i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.

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(630): i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween. http://tfl.nu/iqfz

Replies (56) Good night (6691) Bad night (1021)
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(785): View more from Kansas

So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.

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(785): So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again. http://tfl.nu/nxev

Replies (16) Good night (806) Bad night (5790)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.

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(508): I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch. http://tfl.nu/jvw8

Replies (22) Good night (1126) Bad night (8098)
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(408): View more from California

Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape

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(408): Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape http://tfl.nu/uzlj

Replies (10) Good night (4098) Bad night (1519)
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(303): View more from Colorado

im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working

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(303): im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working http://tfl.nu/2ufm

Replies (5) Good night (1474) Bad night (3742)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.

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(617): Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night. http://tfl.nu/xmy8

Replies (4) Good night (2182) Bad night (966)
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(207): View more from Maine

DRUNK CANOEING

(804): View more from Virginia

Please text me if you survive.

(207): View more from Maine

LAND HO BITCH

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(207): DRUNK CANOEING (804): Please text me if you survive. (207): LAND HO BITCH http://tfl.nu/6y3l

Replies (27) Good night (10459) Bad night (1048)
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(816): View more from Missouri

If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story

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(816): If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story http://tfl.nu/6mc2

Replies (6) Good night (984) Bad night (1440)
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(817): View more from Texas

Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"

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(817): Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent" http://tfl.nu/6trp

Replies (6) Good night (1380) Bad night (2759)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign

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(603): Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign http://tfl.nu/pss1

Replies (6) Good night (1604) Bad night (522)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy

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(701): All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy http://tfl.nu/indb

Replies (5) Good night (438) Bad night (608)
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(817): View more from Texas

you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"

(682): View more from Texas

God please dont post that to facebook.

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(817): you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe" (682): God please dont post that to facebook. http://tfl.nu/pwe8

Replies (3) Good night (445) Bad night (498)
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(+61): View more from Australia

Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.

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(+61): Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things. http://tfl.nu/ocj8

Replies (4) Good night (609) Bad night (322)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.

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(405): That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing. http://tfl.nu/0pwv

Replies (4) Good night (646) Bad night (217)

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