Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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