chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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