Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
