On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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