I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
