Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
