If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
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