everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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