so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Randomize
