I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
