I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
