im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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