I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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