i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
