Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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