we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize