i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize